I've made one of these lists the past two years...guess this trip around the sun shouldn't be any different...
A FEW THINGS I PROBABLY WON'T GET AROUND TO DOING IN '09:
*Catch, gut, cook, and eat the mighty Cthulhu.
*Walk a mile in another man's shoes, then promptly plead no contest to misdemeanor theft.
*Take a drive to Missouri and finish hand digging that tunnel to the moon I started when I was five.
*"Acquire" the deed to the Large Hadron Collider and convert it into a speakeasy (password is "Fruitcake sent me"...alternate password is "May His Merciful Shadow buy the first round").
*Surgically graft a pair of wool socks to my feet...imagine how much time that would save.
*Successfully petition the I.O.C. to introduce Freestyle Daydreaming as an Olympic sport, then promptly set about bribing judges for the big payoff in either '10 or '12...depending on how quickly I can become conversant in French and Chinese...in either case, look for my smiling, airbrushed, corporate-approved likeness coming soon to a cereal box near you (and you can damn well bet said cereal will be loaded down with enough sugar to dissolve baby teeth on contact).